God as my source.

This year has been one of those interesting and challenging years in the area of money and the source from where my needs are met. 

Throughout the years, I have worked in long term contract or permanent full-time employment, always being able to pay for things in one go, go to any concert I wanted, ability to save, go on shopping sprees, buy the latest fashions, money being availble and always on hand for anything, always having enough to do what I wanted and when I wanted to do it.   Most of the time, I really enjoyed saving the money for that large purchase I was able pay in one go and feeling a sense of accomplishment in this.  I also loved watching the interest of my mortgage decrease as  I made extra payments and the ability to just save and watch it grow and have that safety net for when that rainy day came.  Well, that rainy day did come and for a lot longer than I anticipated.  So far, it has been 17 months.

Over this time, I have worked in short term contracts and temporary job assignments.  I had more time out of work than in work.  This took me on a new journey and level of trust in God, that I thought I already had.    I thought my trust was in the Lord, but my trust was in the savings in my bank account.  As started to see this money decrease, I needed to make a decision of whether I was going to be anxious about this or choose to trust God to meet my needs. 

At the start of this year, I prayed a prayer that only the brave should pray.  My prayer went something like this:
'Lord, increase my level of trust in You so that I may know you more and bring me to a place where I am totally dependant on You.' 

If you don't think He answers prayer, try this one out and I guarantee He will answer it.   I came to a cross road in my life where I needed Him to be so real to me and everything else just didn't satisfy me anymore.  I knew I needed to reach a new level in Him (a deeper level).   I knew that this prayer would cost me. I didn't realise the full impact until later this year, but I am learning fast now. LOL 

One of the major lessons I am learning is that my focus needed to change to see God as  my only source who could meet my every need in life, not my employment whether it be current or future, nor my fortnightly Centrelink (government) allowance or the money I saved in the bank for a rainy day.   I started to see that these provisions were only temporal, they had limitations as my savings was depleting and a job could be taken from me at any time.  God's resources were so much more varied and unlimited and I only had  the Lord to hold onto.  My dependance on Him was and is becoming greater.

It's interesting, although I am still on this journey (and this I am sure will be a continual process), the Lord is showing me that He knows what all my needs are and will not leave me with nothing, even though sometimes it seems like I am living so close to the edge of this.  He is showing me and opening my eyes to the blessings of every day and His provision that's available through His many different ways and avenues.

Through this time, He is challenging me to continue to tithe out of obedience and give in other areas while I have this large financial need in my life.   His desire is to bless me more than I desire to be blessed.   I know I can't afford not to tithe, because it's better to obey and trust than depend on my own means and ways of doing things.

As the bills come in, this is where I am challenged the most, but God has provided work when required.  During this season, I haven't always been able to buy or pay off most things in one go as before and I have had to go without some expenses, which I found I haven't really needed to purchase afterall and at times God has provided this need in other ways.  When I start to get anxious, I am constantly reminding myself and putting into perspective that He is trustworthy and faithful.  He sticks to His promises and promised in His word that He will supply all my needs according to his riches in glory and He has done that so far and I know there is so much more to come. 

So far,  I have had two interstate holidays in Adelaide and Queensland.    I have attended three major conferences (Graham Cooke and James Goll, Dan McCallum and Brenton Brown and a international CRC conference in Adelaide).  I have been to a Guy Sebastian concert.   I have all my survival needs met: food on the table, a roof over my head, all my utility bills paid before the due date, clothes on my back, petrol in the car as well as a vehicle to go places and  family and friends who love me and all the talents, gifts and abilities He has created within me plus much more.  The most important for me is having the Lord in my life, who is continually directing and guiding me, because without Him I don't know where I would be.

I have noticed that when I am working in any organisation, I am not tied to the job or position anymore or the management in charge of me.  My focus is becoming more on the Lord.  He is in charge of my needs and is teaching me to relax (learning not to be anxious about how long the contract will go), and there is favour with the Lord while trusting in Him with all present and future needs and finances or resources become available when I need it. This, of course, is a process and it's a journey but God has never let me down, when I do my part and that's trust and obey.

For example, when I came back from Adelaide in October this year, I had electricity, gas, water, telephone, rates and my mortgage all come in at once.  I had spent more money in Adelaide than budgeted, I didn't have a lot of money left and the only income was through Centrelink (Australian Government allowance).  God knew I needed assistance and supplied me with part-time work for six weeks.  I have paid all the bills before their due date and paid half of those bills that are not yet due.

God has made a promise to take care of me and all I need is to trust and learn to take care of what He cares about.  He is so true to His promises and because I am learning to trust Him for my needs, and not what work brings in, He is showing me time and time again that He is so faithful.

God is allowing this season in my life to happen, so He can reveal a greater measure of Himself to me and to trust the only One (my Lord) who is faithful and trustworthy.  What He can do for me, He can do for you.  I am a tesimony to this and my testimony continues.

Life is so good... God is so good.  As I look back and review what has happened so far... I am truly BLESSED and I know there are more exciting things to come.